Sometimes the environment makes us change our mindset. Whatever that you've decided to be, time might just wear it down & makes it seem so easy to just let it go. Close one eye, they say, then it wouldn't bother you that much.

But is it true? Will it really bother you less?
Somewhat it really just bothered me a little more. :\

To be honest, I really miss having people caring about me. But in fact, I know many people do care about me, they just don't show it. And also probably because of the thick layer of fats around, so I don't feel it. :x

When people get presents, I'll be like, where's mine?
On their birthdays, they get wishes and celebrations. I'll be like, where's mine?

I'm envious of people with family members and close friends surrounding them. & I feel quite sad that sometimes, they don't treasure it. Of course people always take things for granted. That's human nature.
But I don't even have that chance.

Sometimes I sit by myself and think: my mom don't even know me at all... & she's already disappointed with me.

Pressure.

My friends don't even understand what I think, & they've already concluded that I've changed and I don't about them, but maybe for the worse.

Pressure.

I cannot even make proper decisions for myself.

Pressure.

I wonder why I'm so useless.